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IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME NOW

Shikami Yamino

Dedicated with love to Shimo-chan


Please note that the song "It's All Coming Back To Me Now" belongs to Celine Dion.

[There were nights when the wind was so cold]

In a backdrop of a star-dotted night sky, a lone boy with the most unusual bangs sat up in bed and shivered, his silhouetted lined by faint moonlight in front of the window.

[That my body froze in bed]

Moon-lit forest green eyes turned to the window as the shadows of trees wildly swaying in the background play havoc over the slender face.

[If I just listened to it]

The eyes closed and the boy wraps his arms around himself to stop the shivering that had started up.

[Right outside the window]

Camera pans out and the big top of the main circus tent fills the screen before fading.


[There were days when the sun was so cruel]

Bright and scorching sunlight beat down upon the caravan of animals and humans travelling across the flat land.

[That all the tears turned to dust]

Trowa's face as he walked beside his lion's cage was in a frown of concentration as a single tear rolled down his cheeks.

[And I just knew my eyes were]

The frown increased until Trowa was grimacing but then faded as he relaxed, turning his resigned face up to the cloudless sky above.

[Drying up forever]

Forest green eyes opened in confusion, knowing they were missing something and yet unsure of what.


[I finished crying in the instant that you left]

An emotionless Trowa's face, half covered by the half mask of his costume sits as he waits for his entrance que. A silhouette of a slender figure with short hair superimposes the face.

[And I can't remember where or when or how]

Trowa clutches his head, breathing heavily trying to hold onto the image only to have it slip into the bright light behind.

[And I banished every memory you and I had ever made]

A curtain fluttered and Trowa looked up still shaken but in control. With a shake of his head to dispel the last images, he steps out into the ring.


[But when you touch me like this]

Trowa, sitting on the hay next to his lion, starts awake when a slight hand touches his arm.

[And you hold me like that]

Catherine's face comes into view and leans down to give him a hug before patting his arm and leaving.

[I just have to admit]

Trowa stares after the retreating figure as shadowy arms form to enclasp him in a hug that was more intimate than the sisterly hug Catherine had just given him.

[That it's all coming back to me]

Forest green eyes widen as the misty image of a small blond boy with sparkling azure blue eyes appears to superimpose those eyes.

[When I touch you like this]

Flashback: Trowa and Quatre sitting side by side on a couch as Quatre paints a small smile on his face and reaches to lay his hand on Trowa's immobile arm.

[And I hold you like that]

Trowa turns to look at Quatre and gives the barest semblance of a smile before enfolding the petite blond in his arms. End flashback.

[It's so hard to believe but]

Camera pans out of a deep green eye and Trowa's eyes focus again as he shakes his head in disbelief.

[It's all coming back to me]

A familiar emotionlessness comes over Trowa's face as he pushes past a shocked Catherine and into the star-studded night.


[There were moments of gold]

Trowa sneaks his way around a hanger but stops as a flash of the golden Arabian boy appears before his eyes.

[And there were flashes of light]

Trowa leans against a wall and then closes his eyes to see rapid scenes of his past with Quatre fly past his eyes.

[There were things I'd never do again]

Opening his eyes, Trowa takes a deep breath and then runs and jumps into the cockpit of the Taurus he'd been standing next to.

[But then they'd always seemed right]

Despite the loss of memory, Trowa starts up the Mobile Suit with ease and precise mechanical movements, not once taking his eyes off the visual screen in front.

[There were nights of endless pleasure]

Flashback: Trowa and Quatre sit in each other's arms under the full moon and Quatre smiles up at the darkened green eyes before his mouth is taken fully. End flashback.

[It was more than any laws allow Baby Baby]

The visual screen comes back and Quatre's face is seen though unseeing of the softer forest eyes that watch him.


[If I kiss you like this]

The Taurus takes off and inside, Trowa continues to look at the image of Quatre on the screen before putting up a slender hand to touch his lips.

[And if you whisper like that]

A flash of Quatre's cockpit as he stares in shock at the image of Trowa that has just appeared on the screen, mouth forming the words to say his name.

[It was lost long ago]

Tears well in Quatre's eyes as the image of when he was turned away from Trowa by Catherine superimposes his liquid blue eyes.

[But it's all coming back to me]

Scene switches back to Trowa's cockpit and he gazes at Quatre for a second before the one visible green eye and the lips begin to show a smile of recognition.

[If you want me like this]

Sandrock flies towards the Taurus approaching at a high speed and the remains of the Leo squadron give chase.

[And if you need me like that]

Green eye steeling, Trowa launches himself into the fray and cuts down one Leo as it was about to fire on the back of Sandrock.

[It was dead long ago]

Trowa staring in shock as he mindlessly pilots the suit he's in, staring at the controls with a strange familiarity yet unfamiliar at the same time.

[But it's all coming back to me]

Faint images of Heavyarms' beam gatling, army knife, and twin gatlings flash in front of Trowa's eyes and the answering reaction was the pulling on the already taut mouth and the hardness of the deep green eyes.

[It's so hard to resist]

Flashes of Quatre's sweet face fly past Trowa's eyes in rapid succession.

[And it's all coming back to me]

Focus on a particular scene as it fills the screen and Quatre is seen smiling lovingly at the relaxed form of Trowa next to him, both looking out over the vast expanse of blue ocean.

[I can barely recall]

The fleeting image of the bright sunlight in the background is once again seen and the silhouetted figure is again moving away into the light.

[But it's all coming back to me now]

The figure then seems to hesitate before walking back towards the screen and as the shadow cast over the body is lightened, we see Quatre's shining face, laughing happily.


[There were those empty threats and hollow lies]

Flashback: Quatre sitting in the cockpit of Wing Zero, eyes wild under the imfluence of the Zero System, coldly forming the words that left Trowa shocked.

[And whenever you tried to hurt me]

Trowa's eyes in the Vayeate widen as the bright beam of Wing Zero's beam cannon explode towards the prone form of Mercurius.

[I just hurt you even worse]

Vayeate rushed in front of the Mercurius and was engulfed in the bright yellow sizzling light. Quatre's eyes widened and he yelled Trowa's name in anguish. End flashback.

[And so much deeper]

Flashback: Quatre wandering away from the tent top that fills the skyline, wiping stray tears from his eyes. He turns to cast a longing look behind him before breaking into a run. End flashback.


[There were hours that just went on for days]

A fleeting image of Trowa in his deep space suit drifting in an expanse of darkness flits across the screen before dissolving into a night-time scene of a hill top surrounded by darkened trees.

[When alone at last we'd count up all the chances]

Two shadowed figures stand a few feet apart, both silent and unmoving.

[That were lost to us forever]

Night-darkened blue eyes reflect the soft face of Trowa before screen is filled with one soft deep green eye, reflecting the hopeful look on Quatre's face.


[But you were history with the slamming of the door]

Flashback: Seen from Trowa's point of view as eyelids slowly close over the image of the battling Wing Zero and Mercurius as they fly into a docking area and the air-lock door is slid shut. End flashback.

[And I made myself so strong again somehow]

Flashback: Trowa, wandering aimlessly around in the rain until an auburn haired girl in front of him drops her groceries and flings her arms around him in a tight hug. End flashback.

[And I never wasted any of my time on you since then]

Flashback: Quatre, smilingly walks towards the amnesiac Trowa who gives him a scared look before quickly walking away and disappearing into a flap of the tent. End flashback.


[But if I touch you like this]

Cut back to the darkened forest scene as Trowa, uncertainly reaches out a hand towards Quatre and hesitantly touches Quatre's cheek.

[And if you kiss me like that]

Quatre closes his eyes and turns into the hand, placing a light kiss on the palm of the hand cupping his cheek.

[It was so long ago]

Wide blue eyes opened again, searching for any sign of uncomfort in the green eyes that confront him.

[But it's all coming back to me]

Trowa's eyes only show relief and softness as he smiles slightly.

[If you touch me like this]

Quatre sighs and holds up a hand to lean once again into the hand on his cheek.

[And if I kiss you like that]

Trowa takes a bold step forward and then closes his eyes before placing a gentle soft kiss on Quatre's forehead.

[It was gone with the wind]

Blue eyes snap open and lock with the green ones gazing unfailingly into them as a gentle breeze ruffles the pair's hair.

[But it's all coming back to me]

Grins break out over both boys' faces as they begin to move closer.


[When you touch me like this]

Camera begins to pan out from the close up of the faces as Quatre lifts a hand and smooth a thumb over Trowa's lips.

[And when you hold me like that]

In a burst of movement, Quatre flings himself into Trowa's arms and buries his face in Trowa's neck, turned away from the camera.

[It was gone with the wind]

Trowa, in turn, lowers his face to Quatre's hair and for a few moments the only movement was the slight ruffling of hair by the breeze.

[But it's all coming back to me]

Taking a deep breath, Trowa nuzzles Quatre's hair before pulling back and allowing Quatre to lift his own head though not letting up the tight hug he had the Arabian in.

[When you see me like this]

When Quatre finally lifts his head, Trowa is actually fully smiling, a single green eye portraying all his love and longing.

[And when I see you like that]

Quatre's face lights up under Trowa's gaze and tears of happiness slowly gather.

[Then we see what we want to see]

Trowa slowly shakes his head and holds up a gentle finger to wipe away the tears before they can fall.

[All coming back to me]

The two hug again as the camera pans back and the screen in misted over.

[The flesh and the fantasies]

A bloody battlefield fills the vision before it is rapidly swept away by the image of an understanding Quatre.

[All coming back to me]

Foggy mist fills the screen and Trowa is seen gazing around trembling slightly.

[I can barely recall]

As camera pans into Trowa, he holds out his arm to reach something that isn't there, a pained look overcoming his features.

[But it's all coming back to me now]

Trowa's face then becomes loving and the camera pans back to see Quatre in his arms, wearing an adoring expression.


[If you forgive me all this]

Anxious green eyes searches the blue ones in front for the forgiveness that lies there as a flash of that sunny day when Quatre was turned away from the circus appears.

[If I forgive you all that]

Blue eyes searches the green ones also with a worried expression. A flash of Wing Zero's beam cannon once again blasting out towards Vayeate.

[We forgive and forget]

Camera pans out and we see a side profile of both on a white background, both smiling gently.

[And it's all coming back to me]

A picture of Quatre with his head tucked under Trowa's chin, eyes closed and smiling contentedly superimposes the white background.

[When you see me like this]

The Taurus pivots and runs, guns blazing as it runs a gauntlet of mobile suits.

[And when I see you like that]

Sandrock leaps and comes down with twin crescent blades slashing, running through the mobile suits on either side.

[We see just what we want to see]

The Taurus, locked in combat, protecting Sandrock's back as Sandrock does the same. Screen splits and both faces are seen inside their cockpits, determined and protective.

[All coming back to me]

Screen flashes back to the fight as the Taurus's shape is gradually taken over by the bigger bulk of Gundam Heavyarms.

[The flesh and the fantasies]

Flashback: The first time Gundam Sandrock and Heavyarms met, Quatre and Trowa walking out on their hatches to lay eyes on each other for the first time. End flashback.

[All coming back to me]

A flash of Quatre's large estate as Trowa's eyes are closed over his flute while Quatre accompanies him on the violin.

[I can barely recall but it's all coming back to me now]

Flashback: Quatre's anxious eyes as he whispers a few words that leaves Trowa stunned. Shock flows out of the green eyes as something else softer replaces it and Trowa gently hugs the small blond to him, vowing to never let go. End flashback.


[(It's all coming back to me now) And when you kiss me like this]

Scene changes to a small cliff where two silhouettes are seen, watching the last rays of the dying sun.

[(It's all coming back to me now) And when I touch you like that]

The taller figure raises a hand and clasps the shorter one's hand.

[(It's all coming back to me now) If you do it like this]

The two figures turn towards each other and step in closer, the shorter one lifting his face while the taller one lowers.

[(It's all coming back to me now) And if we...]

Two silhouettes mingle as they connect first from lips and then body until they are almost seen as one. Camera pans as the last visible portion of the sun disappears behind a sea of clear, dark, blueness.

Fade to black.


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